Quotes from a story about pies in the face
And only the quotes. Via a terrific NYT story.
"Boom him in the face." … "I didn't know if I should or not." … "In my day, they had more creative ways to sort of celebrate." … "Pieing would have been silly, kids' stuff. We would put a live snake in a guy's underwear. That is something that real men would do. This is silly stuff, you know what I mean? It's kid stuff. The guys today, they're inexperienced." … "I don't remember this happening 20 years ago."
"We don't like our heroes to be carried off the shoulders of adoring fans or teammates anymore. It makes our heroic players seem like regular guys, and we like them to have 90 seconds of insipid postgame interview capped by the pricking of the gonfalon bubble."
"Therefore, the events on the field have to be more momentous than they've ever been. So celebrations are vastly more elaborate than in my day. In my day, a guy hit a home run, it was a home run: You put your head down, you ran around the bases, you went in and you shut up. Now it's a reason for raising your arms to the skies, pirouetting, a curtain call." … "It's not even a pie. Burnett sprays some stuff in a towel. I want to see pie crusts. I want to see it thrown, really mashed in someone's face. Instead, it's this reach-around nonsense."
"The actual dexterity of it was tremendously impressive. Right into my face. The show ended with me not only wiping the whipped cream off my face, but protesting that something had gone wrong here. And [Al] Roker and [Soupy] Sales were convulsed." (Thank you, Bob Costas.)
